Happy happy Thursday!
It’s another edition of Shay’s Random Grab Bag!
You know the drill…I pull some of your random questions and answer them all here in one little post.
If you missed Grab Bag #1, I covered everything from Kensington’s daily g-free meals, to where Andrew buys his clothes, marriage advice and more! Catch it HERE. If you missed Grab Bag #2, I cover how I handle crappy days, parenting tips, how I started my travel agency, how I pack my toiletries and how I organize my closet! You can read that one HERE.
Grab your coffee and settle in! Here are the random questions from my grab bag this time…
I received several different versions of this same question…how I plan trips for just Andrew and me, our entire family, when we travel with the Slaughters and when we go with extended family. I also received many about planning trips for my extended family, so I thought I’d break all of those things down right here 🙂 .
Here we go:
Andrew and me: We talk about trips pretty much daily over here at our house. Andrew and I are always itching to go somewhere. Anywhere. All the time. We have a list of places we want to see (some new, some oldies that we love so much, we want to revisit). We also have certain times of year we like to travel and when they fit with our schedule, we make them work. For instance, we love to get away during the fall, so we try hard to make that trip work. I would say that our list is a mix of domestic and international and almost exclusively seasonal (we like to go warm places in the summer, cold places in the winter and where the leaves are changing in the fall). We decide on the locations about a year in advance and then plan accordingly. I plan our vacations, but Andrew totally has an opinion, is super knowledgeable and helps A TON! When we travel just the two of us, the trips are typically shorter than when we travel with our family.
Our family: Well, we love traveling over here, and it’s totally rubbed off on our kids too! Our kids have big opinions about where they want to go for each trip, and we try our hardest to lean into those suggestions as often as possible. We typically do three big trips a year (ski trip over Christmas, spring break trip and summer trip) with other smaller trips thrown in (Smith will snowboard extra, this year, Mades went to Disney World, sometimes Kensington will go to a Red Sox game with me, etc). We now have four kids that want to visit Nantucket every year together too…so, we’re going to try and make that work as well. Basically, we’re six people who love to travel, so we’re always talking about it. For trips like the ski vacations, Andrew is mostly in charge as he’s the “ski guy” in our family. We collectively talk about it things we like to do/see/eat when we’re skiing, and then Andrew pitches us some ideas and we all kind of agree on where to go. For our summer vacations, we spend a lot of time talking about where we want to go since this is the trip where we have the most time. We have a list a mile long of places we want to check off our bucket list and each summer, we try to tackle them one at a time. Our kids are old enough now that they can realllly speak into these trips and help us plan them. Due to COVID, we feel like we’re about three summers behind on our vacation to-do list, but that’s okay…we’re going to just make them up one at a time. For our trip this summer, we’ve already settled on a destination and planned it. Both big kids spoke into this trip quite a bit, so we’re extra excited to take them!
Traveling with these four is basically our favorite thing to do! We love the adventures, the learning, the seeing and doing, but what we love most of all is the time unplugged and away from all other distractions.
Our other favorite people to travel with though are…
…Tab and Erika 🙂 . We love, love, love traveling with the Slaughter adults and…
…the Slaughter kids! I would say that out of all the years of traveling together and alllll the trips (cruises, land trips, cabin vacation, Walt Disney World, etc), Erika and I are typically the ones who talk about it first, pick out the destination, budget and plan for it. Our hubbies are super happy to tag along and enjoy the fruits of our labor. They work hard when planning the ski trips for the families, but Erika and I are the ones who are like “hey, this year for spring break, we’re going ___ so pack your swimsuit and take off work”. Erika and I work really well together when planning these trips. You can hear us talk all about it on episodes 1 and 2 of Season 2 of our podcast, The Bestie Breakdown. We get into super specifics about traveling together and planning our trips.
Trips for the parents and with the parents: Awwwwwwww! Andrew and I LOVE traveling with both sets of our parents!! It’s such a blessing to us that we still have all four parents and that they’re in a place where they can travel with their grandkids. Our parents are dear friends too which makes the whole trip extra, extra special. When we travel with them, it’s always Andrew and me that throw out the idea “hey, do you guys want to meet us ___” for a trip? These four people make things so easy because they don’t care where we’re going or when, they just want to come along too. I also book individual trips for each couple throughout the year too at my travel agency. Right now, I have trips booked for both sets of parents for this year…so that’s extra exciting for them!
Agh! I’m reading books just as quickly as I can! I wish I could read even more than I do, but that’s just not possible. If you’re looking for a good book, make sure you go back and read all of my books from years past. You can find them all linked in one spot (yes, I know, I should have an alphabetical list of every book I’ve ever read and reviewed but at this point, I think that’s over 400 books sooooooo…I don’t have the time to organize that!). You an also search in the search bar here on my blog a title of a book and it will pull up the post if I have read it and reviewed it. My February Book Review is coming up at the end of the month, and so more books will be added then. If you have other suggestions on how I can make finding my book reviews easier, I’m all ears!
I mean, this could probably be a post all its own, but basically, Andrew and I are neat freaks that can’t focus if our house isn’t super tidy, so we are constantly cleaning and picking up…and annoying our kids with our cleanliness. We have a very sweet lady that comes over once a week for the “big” cleaning (mopping, dusting, bathrooms, etc), and she’s amazing. She does the heavy duty stuff, and then, all week long we just maintain. I think my tips are to “clean as you go”…whether that’s when you’re cooking dinner or playing with your kids, as we make a mess, we clean it up. We also do things like wipe down our kitchen and bathroom counters multiple times a day and also vacuum high traffic areas daily too. I like my sink empty and my bed made. These are just things I make myself do each day so that everything always appears clean. We keep Mr. Clean Magic Erasers stashed all over the house and use them for everything. Seriously, there is nothing that cannot do (counters, scuffs on the wall, bathroom sinks, etc). I used to keep them in one location in my house, but now, we buy a big bucket of them and just store them all over (in each bathroom, I have one in my office, etc). So, no major big tips other than we don’t let things get out of control and pick up as we go. I personally function much better when my space is cleared off and clean…I know that’s not everyone, but for me, that’s very calming to me and makes me more productive.
I received this question/comment a lot too this year! You guys, I added all of my outfits of the day (OOTD) to one spot on my blog to (hopefully!) make finding them easier! You can see my daily outfits right HERE!
If you’re looking on your mobile device, you’ll find it here or if you’re looking on your computer…
…you’ll find it here.
Click either spot to find it (or this link HERE!). I also added a highlight to my Instagram to capture the same thing. I hope this helps!
I feel like Kensington is in a weird stage right now! I’m not going to lie…shopping for her is more challenging. When we used to go to stores like Old Navy, Gap, J Crew or Nordstrom, she would easily wear all of the big kid clothes. Now though, she technically can still wear those clothes (they have her size), but those are also the clothes that fit her first grade sister…and she’s not interested in dressing the same as the seven year old…BUT when we go to the adult section (they also have her size), that’s where her mom shops and she doesn’t want to dress like me either. So, it’s hard! We’re trying to find her own niche but right now, it’s a lot of hit or miss when shopping for her. She likes neutral colors (whites, beiges, creams), doesn’t want to wear brights or vivid colors and her shoe size is now the same as mine. Thirteen needs its own clothing line 🙂 .
That wraps up today’s Grab Bag! I hope you all have THE BEST Thursday! If you have other Grab Bag questions, leave them in the comment section below please!
I’ll see you tomorrow! xx
Danette says
Hi Shay, I love these little Q&A post you do – they are so insightful and I enjoy reading little tidbits about your life! 🙂 I was wondering if you ever read classic books, and which ones are your favorite? I would love some recommendations! I always enjoy your book reviews and have read some really great books, thanks to you! 🙂 Have a beautiful day!
Mix and Match Mama says
Not in a really long time. I always think about adding them to my list…but don’t know which one to read first?! Any suggestions?
Julie says
Emma! Such a delightful book and remember ‘Clueless’ was based on it so you have to re-watch that after :). Also still love Anna Karenina.
Tracy says
My Anttonia. Willa Cather. My fave but you probably read in high school.
Pamela Geltz says
My favorite classic book is A Tree Grows in Brooklyn. I love to reread that one!
Elspeth says
I love hearing all about your trips! Thank you so much for sharing more information about them!
Plus, o can promise it gets easier for Kensington, I went through the same issue too and it does get better!
http://www.elspethsdaybyday.com
Laura says
Yes, the tween girl shopping is a doozy for sure. I’ve had better success at local boutiques instead of chain stores. We still hit Gap, Old Navy for staples. The boutiques in my town are different enough from chain stores that they’re not dressed like everyone else. It’s fun to watch my girls (15 & 17) figure out their own style.
Sheaffer Sims says
Fun post!
Elizabeth McLenna says
Who watches your kids when you travel just the adults? And how do you maintain schedules with all of their activities? I feel like I would need to write a novel for someone and I just have two kids.
Mix and Match Mama says
Agh! I try not to complain because I am so terribly grateful that our parents take turns watching our kids (each of our parents alternate), but geez Louise, I often think it would be much easier if they just came with us because writing down “all the things” is hard. Our parents doing a fantastic job with the four kids. We’re so super grateful!
Heidi says
Yes! THIS! Wondering how you plan for adults-only vacation while leaving grandparents in charge. How do you plan daily schedules, ride/carpool, directions to locations, appointments, meals! Would love your tips on this – the planning it takes to leave my kids is so onerous I can’t seem to want to face it! You seem to have a system down and we could really use some tips. THANKS!
Valerie Allen says
I understand completely about the inbetween clothing phase. My girls are firmly in their mid teens now, but we found that stores that carry smaller sizes like Hollister (mainly for jeans), American Eagle, Altar’d State (this is their fav!), Abercrombie and Madewell work. It’s a struggle for sure, especially if they are modest.
Traci says
I was going to suggest Altar’d State. My girls love this store.
Nicole says
Hey Shay, I know you’ve walked through death of loved ones and I’m asking for advice. My dad just went to be with Jesus after fighting and battling Stage 4 cancer. We have been walking through this the past few months, but especially the last couple weeks. I know he is with Jesus, I know he is free from suffering now, but it just hurts so bad. I know Jesus is near and He truly has shown up over and over, but my siblings, my own babies…we just don’t want to say goodbye. I feel like I’m drowning at times, like I just need life to pause while I go through this and it obviously doesn’t. What helped you as you walked through this? Thank you. ❤️
Mix and Match Mama says
Oh Nicole, I am so sorry! I have not experienced the loss of a parent, so I’m not even going to begin to understand your grief. I am just so sorry. I am going to be praying for you. I am going to write your name in my prayer journal now and pray for you and your family as you walk this road. I wish I could do more, but please know that my heart is truly broken for you and I’m so very sorry.
Erika Slaughter says
Speaking of that, it’s time for us to get a trip on the books…don’t you think?
Mix and Match Mama says
YESSSSSSS!
Mary says
Hi! Love this. Can you do a blog post on the workouts you and Erika are doing? I believe you said Andrew wrote them for y’all. Thank you!
Libby says
YES!!! 13 needs it’s own clothing line! The struggle is real. Doesn’t get much better as they age, as finding “appropriate” clothing has become challenging.
Dana P says
Love these posts! I agree, the early teen years are terrible for finding clothes. I don’t even understand some of the looks right now! Have you seen Kelly from Kelly’s Korner talk about it? ? Thankfully our almost 16 year-old really likes most of my style again!
I started Becoming Mrs. Lewis a few days ago and am really enjoying it! I’m wondering if it’s going to help me cross over into more classic books? Thanks for the suggestion!
KatieB says
Fully agree that there needs to be just teen stores. My daughter is 13 as well and is in this full limbo stage especially when looking for dresses. Too old for little girl things but not quite ready for mature lady outfits.
Kay says
Hi Shay-
Oooh, a clothing line for 13 yo, I LOVE it. I also have a 13 year old daughter and we have the same exact issue! Where does she buy clothes that aren’t Mom or tween?
A little off topic, but I’m dying to ask you a question about ‘Becoming Mrs. Lewis!’ (SPOILER ALERT) I know it’s so far one of your favorites, and I agree with you on 99.98% of book choices-it’s awesome. But for some reason, I’m so sad about her sons is this book! I felt like she left them behind in a tough situation, then came back and it was rough, and then she moved them and then! she is sending them away to school. It kind of broke my heart and I just can’t move past it enough to like her. Did that bother you? I was talking to my daughter who LOVES books and she was like, ‘you have to be. more open to her and not judge her’ lol. Maybe she’s right!
Anyway, curious what you thought about all that! And can’t wait for your next book review.
Mix and Match Mama says
SPOILER DON’T READ!!!
I thought the same thing. Looking back now, I like to think of it as her being a super flawed human that God was still able to use to do great things. That at least gives me peace that God can use this super flawed human. I agree though, as a mom, that part seemed selfish…but who am I to judge? I mean…I did a bit…Ha…but I really shouldn’t have.
Tiffanie says
Agree on her leaving her kids, but then I had to step back and think about what a “scholarly” career would require at that time and would we have judged her if she was a man for leaving to research a book.
Leslie S says
Yes! Young teen fashion is SO hard!! Wish there was a good place to find things they really love! Maybe some teens will get together and create a capsule concept?!
Kristy says
I agree! I have a very tall, mature 11 year old girl and shopping for “real” clothes, not athleisurewear is hard!
Kristin M says
I feel you on the shopping for a teenager, my daughter is 14 next week and shopping for her is unusual. Also letting them develop their own style but finding that most clothes are ‘half a shirt’ or ‘uber short shorts’ is a challenge too!
Amanda says
This age is the hardest age to shop for!!!! The struggle is real.
Johannah says
Shopping with teen girls can be the worst, but I have a hack!! I made my daughter an appointment with a Nordstrom stylist– which took me out of the equation. It saved us both a lot of heartache. 😉
Pam Bryson says
My almost 13 granddaughter loves to buy clothes at American Eagle, Aeropostale, and Victoria Secret. She always looks cute!!
Andrea Conrad says
How do you handle other people making unkind comments about your kids (specifically Ashby)? We have several kids with special needs and I always struggle with how to respond/deal with a situation in which someone (usually another kid) says something unkind/inconsiderate. I know they don’t always mean for it to be insulting, but I find my “mama bear” really coming out in situations like that. I’ve talked to one of my kids about this a lot (why people say things that are unkind) but it’s still so hard.
Mix and Match Mama says
Hmmmmm…that could be a whole post…
Ashley says
Hey Shay! Have you ever considered creating a Goodreads account? It would be a fantastic (and simple) way to record all the books that you’ve read so that your followers can see! You can rate each book and it would be a great way to keep your books organized. You can also document the books you want to read!
Mix and Match Mama says
Yes! I did that for a long time and then forgot about it. I should probably see where I left off and go from there!
Cyndi W. says
Love your first Grab Bag post regarding specific religious books! You have a beautiful mind.
My question is: have you ever joined the packing in only a carry on and backpack craze? My BFFs have tried (unsuccessfully so far, Ha!) to encourage (push) me to pack in a carry on and then halfway through the trip if a week+ launder or have cleaned in Europe. Your thoughts?
Mix and Match Mama says
No way! I like to come prepared and don’t mind packing a suitcase. If I were backpacking across Europe, I would pack lighter, but since I’m not, I do not worry about packing light. Even when I was a young teen going to Europe with a girlfriend, I brought a suitcase 😉 .
Danna F says
I feel for you about the teen years and trying to find clothes. What about Altar’d State? It’s christian based clothing store. Now the tricky part is not loving all the stuff yourself. Also Hayden Girls is an online store for tweens.
Have a great Thursday!
Mindy Tierney says
My daughter just turned 17. Almost all her clothes in the last 4+ years have been from the juniors section at Kohls. We have a nice sized store locally. They are in-style clothes and fit her great. The key is junior department instead of kids/misses.
Alexandra says
The BP line in Nordstrom is fabulous for teens!! You’re already a Nordy lover; you should seriously check it out!
Joanne says
So jealous of all that traveling! I am a traveler tucked into a family of home bodies and workaholics.
Molly Chandler says
Oh my goodness! My daughter is also 13 and having the same problem. We’ve found American Eagle and Altr’d State. It’s hard to find clothes that are appropriate for a 13 year old!
Liz says
Has Kensington tried stores like American Eagle yet? I’m 28 and I feel like some things would be good for her! Some things may be “cropped” but I find if I get a larger size they aren’t as cropped. They are definitely a store you need to go in to though because sometimes they are super loose fabrics and sometimes super tight. Just an idea 🙂 or maybe Francescas? Same thing, some things may be “older” but some may be perfect for her!
KK says
Speaking of books, (and I promise I won’t pester after this time…), but do you think you’ll continue the book club via the podcast? I loved it, but maybe you found it didn’t connect with most listeners? Or maybe it’s just on a hiatus. Wanted you to know, I would love to see it come back. 🙂
Thanks for your posts! Love these.
Mix and Match Mama says
I think we felt like it was hard to do on several levels. For Erika and me, getting the timing down of actually reading the books and then recording the episode (we record them in advance too) was tricky. It was also hard to pick a book everyone loved. We had more emails during the book episodes from people, so we know a lot of you read them with us, but I’m not sure if it’s something we can consistently do. I think we’ll probably have a book #3 but I don’t now when that will be.
K.K. says
Thanks, Shay!
Sharon Jones says
Have you and Erica ever thought about video taping your podcast? I don’t listen to podcasts because I can’t tell which person is talking. It’s frustrating. I love the videos that you and Andrew make.
Mix and Match Mama says
We haven’t discussed that, but I’m not opposed to it!
Erinn says
You always have the best individual Bible studies…do you have any you suggest for a mixed group of men and women? We meet once a month and need new ideas. It could be a book that we discuss for a couple months or a one night study! Thank you!
Also love to hear more about your designer fashion items! Scarves bags how often you buy them and see them!
Mix and Match Mama says
Yes, yes, yes! Kyle Idleman’s book Not a Fan is perfect for mixed couples!
Claire says
Sounds like we all share the struggle of finding clothes for 13 year olds!! My daughter is now 14 and just hold your hope because it has gotten a bit easier! It took a while for us to find “teen” places… and it definitely varies. Has she looked at Altar’d state? Also love Zara Women’s for jeans!! I think she has at least 5 pairs from there and she is skinny like K. We have had a lot of luck there but I will say their online is a little funky. My daughter also lives in her Athleta clothes.. she wears a mix of girl and women’s. It’s funny though because sometimes we buy the same thing and I know she is not a big fan of the matching haha! Also, I would say one of her favorites has been Aerie! She lives in their bras. I hope this helped and let me know if you check any of them out! I think so many people would benefit from more shops for young teens!
I am also wondering your favorite places in Florida to take your family on vacation? Our spring break plans to Costa Rica (which we had lined up a year ago) recently got canceled unfortunately. Our spring break is in under 2 months (AH not good for us early-planners) and we are trying to plan a last minute trip! We want to get away to somewhere warm with a beach but I can find Florida tricky with weather so I would love some suggestions! It doesn’t necessarily have to be Florida either. Thank you, Shay!
Mix and Match Mama says
I’m not the best person to ask about Florida. We’ve taken our kids to Disney and then also Miami, but if you’re talking Marco Island or 30A, Erika is the one to ask!
Claire says
Ok, awesome I will ask her! 🙂
Claire says
I would love to ask about Miami… the last I was there was 9 years ago so I’m sure things have changed. Where do you recommend staying?
Mix and Match Mama says
You can read all about our trip last year here: https://mixandmatchmama.com/2021/04/spring-break-in-miami-part-2/
Julie says
I feel like several podcast episodes ago, you and Erika discussed the approximate number of times a week you and your spouses were intimate (I’m blushing as I type this!) Anyway, will you please do another segment on finding time for love with your spouse? Especially for all of us with multiple kids in multiple activities and in different stages of life! I want to know you girls’ secrets to finding time with your man!! Happy belated Valentines!! 🙂
Sara Stafford says
I would love to travel more with our family (four kids and a hubby like you) but packing for all of it completely stresses me out! Any tips?
Mix and Match Mama says
Have you read this post here?! https://mixandmatchmama.com/2019/01/packing-cubes-review/
Shanna Lee says
This is the reason I just opened Coastalmonarchboutique.com
I have a 13 year old daughter that wants to be cute, stylish and confident in her clothing but still keep what God have her covered 😉
We offer sizes 7-Adult large so that we are size inclusive for all girls.
Annie says
When I was 13 I loved American Eagle, Abercrombie & Fitch, Hollister etc. Just a thought for K!
Laura says
Hi Shay!
I was wondering when the lady comes to your house to clean, does she bring her own cleaning supplies or do you provide them and about how many hours does she work? Would you mind sharing a price range of what it would cost an hour or is it a one lump sum for the job? Thanks.
Mix and Match Mama says
We provide all of the supplies and tools (vacuums, mops, etc). It’s just one person, so she comes and spends most of the morning and afternoon here. She’s the only person we’ve ever used (10 years now), so I don’t know how her pricing compares to other people. We love her though!
Lauren says
I’m wondering if Andrew has a skincare routine? My husband asked me what he could do/products to use to take better care of his skin and I wondered if you had any recommendations for men?
Kelly says
Random Reader Question: How much is your grocery bill each week? The average amount you spend on groceries per month?