Today is Tuesday Talk where once a month, I link up with Ashley and Erika who host this fun little blog link up. Every month, you are supposed to chat about anything and everything.
Here’s a recap of last year:
In January, we chatted about whether or not I should keep my home phone. (You overwhelmingly told me TO keep it!)
In February, we chatted about preparing for sitters at your house.
In April, we chatted about a book I read called Unstuffed.
In May, we chatted about what TV shows are good for kiddos.
In July, we chatted about bows and clothes for little girls.
In August, we chatted about whether or not I should get an e-reader (Whoa! Lots of opinions!!)
In September, I showed you guys my sign wall.
In November, we chatted about Instant Pots.
In December, we chatted about books you might want to get for the new year.
And then last month, we chatted about my verse of the week.
Today, friends, I wanted to chat about spending quality time with these people…
…my kiddos 🙂 .
I think we’ve talked about this before, but it’s definitely been a while, so I thought it was time to do it again.
I get emails all the time asking me how I make sure I spend quality time with each child and honestly, I don’t have a ton of great answers…so, I was hoping you guys could help me.
A few years ago, a sweet reader left a comment that said she had several kids and one night a week, each child got it to be their “special night”. I LOVED this idea and we implement it from time to time. What she suggested was that each kid is assigned a night and on that night, all of the other kids go to bed at their normal bedtime and the special kid of the night gets to stay up an extra 20 minutes or so just with mom and dad to do whatever they want. Every time we do this, it’s a HUGE success for our family! I would say that we do a really good job having special nights in the spring and summer (when things are a bit more relaxed around our house) than all year long (it’s harder for us during the fall/holidays when we’re getting back into the school routine and otherwise busier than normal). The rules at our house are that if you get out of bed and/or fight going to bed on someone else’s special night, then you miss yours for the week. At the beginning my kids didn’t get that “yes, Smith is staying up a little later this week, but you get your turn in a few days, so go to sleep now so that we can enjoy his turn and then later, we’ll enjoy your turn”. Now, they all get it, but we had to set up some boundaries at the beginning.
On these nights, we’ve done everything from play board games to watch a special TV show, read books, color and craft (glitter was once involved…ha!), play school and more. I have some really sweet memories of these nights and I hope my kids do too. So, that’s one idea of how we spend individual time with our kids, but of course, I would love some more! Here are a few other ways we do it from time to time too…
1: I’ll take just one of the girls to get their nails done (rotating them).
2: Coffee date with one kid at a time.
3: I like to go for walks or a bike ride with just one kiddo.
4: Andrew will come home a little early and pick up one kid to run an errand and then get ice cream or hot chocolate.
5: We have enjoyed dividing up the kids and traveling to see baseball games. Smith, Andrew and Ashby go to New York to see the Yankees and then Kensington and I head to Boston (Madeley will start to join us soon!).
6: I have my skip days once a year with my school-aged kiddos. I LOVE these days!! We talk about them and look forward to them all year long.
So, there are a few little ideas. Right now, I obviously spend the most one on one time with Madeley because I’m home with her three days a week while the others are in school (I’m home with Ashby and Madeley two days a week). So, I’m always looking for ways to get more time with my bigs who I just don’t see as much during the school year. I just know you mamas out there will probably have some great ideas and suggestions, so please comment and share! I love learning from you ladies 🙂 .
Alexis deZayas says
What a good topic to pick! I love following along with this series!
Erika Slaughter says
I’m coming back later to read all your suggestions!!
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog says
A special night is a great idea for big families, Shay! So important to have that one-on-one time 🙂 your family is the sweetest! ❤️
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
LOVE this one, thank you Shay. Cant wait to come back to read some. This one sounds silly, but do some chores together. This is something happening daily and you get to spend some time with K&S without having to spend money or take them away from home.
This is always a struggle in our house as well with 4 kiddos. I know that spending time with each child also helps to decrease discipline issues. Finding the time with homework and after school activities is hard. I’m anxious to hear more ideas too!
Definitely want to hear more ideas!! I’m home with my baby right now, so she gets plenty of time. My preschooler is home later in the mornings and I pick her up first, so it’s my older girl (she’s in kindergarten) who I see the least. One thing we do is when I need to run up to the store really quick (which happens a few times a week, ha), I’ll take just one girl and then let them pick out a special treat. It’s a super short trip, but it definitely makes them feel special!!
Elspeth Mizner says
Great idea. It also creates special memories your children won’t forget!
My older children (girls) and i have a “Mommy and Me” journal. We started it right as they were able to start writing words i could actually decipher. We write in it and then hide it under the other’s pillow. It’s so cute to see what they have to say when no one’s looking (although sometimes there’s something so cute i have to share it with just my husband). I ask a lot of questions, I’ve got one daughter that draws, another that makes up little puzzles. It’s very sweet and they just love it! It’s also great documentation for trips and birthdays because you can have them fill out little surveys about what they liked/didn’t like about all kinds of events!
I love this idea! I have no kids yet but I love hearing about ideas/ traditions that I can make my own one day!
Lisa N says
I love this!
So sweet! I might have to try this! <3
Do you have any tips for getting kids to stay in bed? For a year now my 3.5 year old fights bedtime and will get up time and time again. He also wakes up in the middle of the night.
Yes! Talk about this. It’s is a constant struggle in our house too
Narci Dreffs says
Great tips!! I can’t wait to come back and read everyone’s ideas. 🙂
Another thing we do – sorry I’ve got four as well (1,5,8,10) so I think about this a lot!- is each kid ha a night of the week assigned to them as my “sous-chef”. They are my only kitchen helper for that night, which includes food prep, setting table, and choosing where we all sit for the night. They start talking about “their” night practically as soon as they wake up!
Sheaffer Sims says
All great ideas! I don’t how all of you mammas with lots of kiddos do it!!!!
Kendra Hobbs says
My daughter loves “craft time” so during my bible study time I incorporated bible journaling and I got her her very own journal to do hers in so we will read a verse or two, share some stories and then I will journal in mine while she colors/crafts in hers…it is great quality time each evening plus it is a great habit for her to start and continue as she gets older!
We’ve just started spending one on one with our two older kids on their birth date each month (each month on the 6th is our son’s turn and the 12th is our daughter’s turn). The baby is only one, so we haven’t started with her yet. ?We are only two months in, but we all enjoy it!
Lizzie @ This Happy Life says
I’m totally introducing skip days this year and I’m so excited!!!
Brooke Richardson says
I think you and Andrew are doing a great job at this. I think just by knowing your child’s love language and their interests is recipe for some perfect one on one time. I like to take one or both boys to the movies or Tyler will take just Cooper to go ice skating. Or just some one on one basketball in the driveway is always a hit. Libby absolutely loves going to the nail salon or even when I paint them myself with her at home. I can’t wait
to come back and read suggestions though.
We do something similar with the night date. I am about to have my 5th kid with my oldest being 6 and in kindergarten. With them being close in age we started having a lot of fighting when dad would come home fighting for his attention. I read one bloggers idea of “tuck in time” where each kid gets a day or two per week where they get to choose the after school show, music in the car that day and get a date after bedtime. She said at first they allowed shows but stopped. She claimed it helped with fighting and has her kids close in age like mine. So we finally tried it and my heck! So easy and simple to give my 3 oldest (2.5, 4, and 6 yrs old) 15 minutes twice a week and they always know whose day it is. It was tricky with understanding at first like you mentioned but it has helped cut down on fighting and has been so fun to see them come alive during that time when they get to choose something to do with one parent. It has been a great success for us!
Amanda @ Cupcake N Dreams says
I’m always so interested to read what everyone does! They all seem like great ways to connect with each child 🙂
Amanda @ Cupcake N Dreams
Alli Mullins says
I have 4 kids as well and struggle with that intentional one on one time. 3 out of the 4 are in school (2 elementary & 1 middle school). I started this year where each Tuesday was ‘their’ day. We are in a rotation and I go eat lunch with that 1 kid bringing them whatever they want for lunch. (Because honestly who has time to go eat lunch with all 4 one day a week-it eats the whole day). Now I hear it’s ‘not cool’ for Mom to come eat lunch with middle schoolers?, so on his day we go have a breakfast date together. It’s really special. The kids love it and always are counting down to their date with Mom.
I have three kids (8,10,11) and on each of their birthdays, I bust them out of school for an hour and take them out for lunch at the place of their choosing. Kind of like your skip day, but they get a kick out of leaving school in the middle of the day and having one on one time with me. We also try! to do a bedtime talk, both parents, with each kid as many nights as we can. We find it’s usually only about 2-3 nights per week, but those nights really count. Each kid gets 5-10 to just vent and have both parents full attention. My husband also took my oldest to Universal after they finished reading Harry Potter, and he’s going to do a solo trip with each of the other’s too.
It’s hard! But we find these few techniques work well.
Great ideas! We feel like we fail bad at one on one time with our kids. Trying to be more intentional about it this year. This past weekend we each took a kid and their requests and spent a few hours just with them. They picked where we went for lunch, a visit to the pet store or mall, and each got a small something new.
Cheryl Cash says
We started Birthday Breakfasts when our oldest turned four years old and it has become our family tradition. On their birthday my husband and I take the birthday girl or boy out for breakfast. Our kiddos (we have four) are teens now but they still look forward to breakfast with Mom and Dad each year on their birthday. At the breakfast we ask a looking back and looking forward question. Discussing highlights from the last year and expectations for the upcoming year have been sweet opportunities to hear their take on things and we are often surprised by what has meant the most to them. We also take the opportunity to pray specifically for the child and speak gratitude or blessing to them over ways we have seen them overcome or endure or grow. These don’t have to be huge, fancy statements. Just moments that are only theirs, away from their siblings, to know we see them and value them for the remarkable creations they are! Blessings to all of you Moms and Dads as you seek to intentionally love your children!
Oh I LOVE this idea!!! I’m going to start doing this once our second kiddo is born. I’m so nervous about how my daughter will feel once the baby is here, so this will perfect to let her know she’s still important to us! Thank you!
Angela Ellingson says
Such an important topic! I need time to slow down. 😉 One of my biggest motivators in deciding to homeschool was simply all of the time we get together that we wouldn’t if they were in school. I still feel like I need to be more intentional about creating space for 1-on-1 time. My husband or I take individual kiddos on dates every once in awhile, but I would love to implement this more consistently. Loving your ideas and reading through the comments.
Kelly Henderson says
We have two kids, 11 year old son and 14 year old daughter. Our son has always been a “Mommy’s boy” so when he was very young, anytime I was not going we called it “boys club” which stuck and they still have this today. My daughter and I get our nails done or go shopping, now that she’s in high school, we have the morning commute to catch up on all things girl. Hubs takes our son to school. Often we flip so I can spend time with our son and my husband with our daughter. It gets a little more complicated with a teenager in the mix but we make the most of any car time we have with her, she’s a captive audience then! I try to remember she will be driving in about 18 months and I won’t have all of this car time.
Molly Bierens says
My husband has breakfast day with each of our kids every week. They all look forward to their breakfast day at Starbucks with Dad before school.
Great topic! We pretty much do the same type of things. As I type, my oldest (8) and my husband are off on a ski trip. Just the two of them. I love that they’re getting to make memories together! I think one on one trips are so fun and such great memories for everyone involved. Family trips are also important, but there’s just something about getting to go away with one of your kids where you’re able to focus all of your time on them. Another one is bringing lunch to my kiddos at school a couple of times throughout the year. It’s a great way to let them know you’re thinking about them during the day even though you’re not with them. And of course, it makes them feel pretty cool too. 🙂
We have three girls aged 3, 5, 6. I absolutely treasure our time together. I know this doesn’t work for every family, but I schedule a two night out of town trip with each of my girls each calendar year. We’ve done everything from visit Meme in NYC to visit my best friend in New Orleans after she had her first baby. Sometimes we drive and sometimes we fly. The events on the trip don’t have to be special, but just the act of sleeping together (which we never do at home), eating every meal together, and having fun child-led conversations leads to such bonding and special moments. Some of my favorite times have been at the airport starbucks sipping our hot chocolate and giggling over the weekend.
My husband is equally intentional. He rotates date nights. We have rules similar to Shay that the other girls go to bed without complaining and are supportive of their sister’s daddy date. Sometimes he plans something extra special but often he lets them pick their favorite restaurant (often Buffalo Wild Wings. LOL!) and then takes them out for ice cream. He looks as forward to these times as the girls do.
I’ve had a friends suggest doing their special day on the day of the month that their birthdays fall, if your birthday is March 22 then the 22nd of each month is “your day”. Obviously this could be problematic if their days overlap or if that month doesn’t have the 31st etc. But it feels for families with busy schedules or lots of kids who can’t do it each week!
We have 3 kids and we rotate a night out each month with one child. So for instance, I’m taking my oldest on Friday for Makeovers and Mexican food! 🙂 Next month, my husband will take our middle child for a fun outing. The following month, I will take our youngest. So, basically each kid gets 2 “nights out” with mom and 2 “nights out” with dad each year. It’s worked great for us and they LOVE it! It is harder around the holidays, but we just make it happen…just like we make date night happen each month too!
So I went to a marriage retreat where the speakers also chatted a little about parenting. They share some EXCELLENT advice…it’s called “The Kid of the Week”- basically you go youngest to oldest…and just rotate each week which child gets to be the kid of the week. They get their name on the special “Kid of the Week” board, they get a special date with mom or dad that week (this might be something simple like, mom’s going to get coffee, kid of the week gets to go with and have cocoa)…they get to choose the movie to watch on movie night etc. Kid of the Week might get to stay up late with mom or dad that night….you get the hang of it. My friend (Sarah Snyder) was the one who told me about this…she explains more on her blog https://aninvitinghome.com/2017/11/kid-of-the-week/ It’s a wonderful thing. I can imagine when kids are bigger that the kid of the week would get to ride shot gun too=) Wouldn’t it be great to eliminate some arguments with that???
Lisa D says
I would take one of my kids for a special afternoon outing to go see a movie, maybe have lunch out too, or grab a snack after the movie. Each child got to pick the movie, of course it was when they were young so the movies were “kids movies” but we all loved the special individual time with them. I have three kids and my husband and I were deliberate about trying to spend one-on-one time. My husband would also do special things with each kid. Got to schedule it in. The kids remember!
I’m a nanny (not a mama yet) and I sometimes stop up at the school to have lunch with one of the girls (different lunch times so it helps) or will surprise them for a quick out to lunch date during school!!
Stephanie Krager says
We have started a summer bucket list and every summer on that list is a “breakfast date with mom” and a “Daddy date” …we let the kiddos choose the place or activity they want and they loved it! Love reading mother ideas! (My kiddos are newly 5, 3.5, and now a 7 almost 8 month old!
Maureen Werner says
I have 7 kiddos with 6 still at home. I also Homeschool so we all spend a lot of time together as a whole! This makes it even more important for me to be intentional in spending one on one time with each of my beautiful children!❤️
My 4 older children are girls 18, 15, 13 and 10 and over the years we have found shared interests that connect us. My oldest daughter and I love to bake together, my 15 year old and I both love to write and read blogs (especially MixandMatchMama!), my 13 year old loves walking in nature and sketching and my youngest daughter loves to write poetry and we go to coffee & poetry reads at a local coffee place! I have also done separate bible studies with each of my girls over the years where we use a particular bible study for a month and then go out to breakfast at the end of the month to celebrate and discuss!
My little ones are twin 5 year old boys and they love to go grocery shopping or run errands with me by themselves! So each week I switch off and take one of them with me. We don’t buy treats or spend extra money, cuz that can really add up for large families, but we do talk and laugh and I know they feel special!
Amanda @ That Inspired Chick says
I love the idea of skip day. We may do that during towards the end of the year this year! That Inspired Chick
Shannon K. says
As children get older it is important to have one on one time as well. My daughter was one year away from getting her license and I was looking for a way to stay connected. We started having breakfast out on Friday mornings. Now that she is driving we still have a standing breakfast on Friday mornings, but now she drives and meets me at the restaurant.
Gail Young says
What a great topic! Growing up I was the middle kid of 5 and my mom had us help her in the kitchen every night that we were home. One helped with food, one with setting the table, one with clearing the table, one cleaning up the kitchen at the end. So we each had time with her, plus we learned how to cook, and be responsible and she could oversee us and we learned how to not be bossy but gracious instead. My dad taught us all the outdoor chores so we got to spend time with him too.
One thing we did with our own 2 boys was to start them on the Envelope System of saving, so once a month my husband would spend an hour with each kid on their own to divvy up 20 one dollar bills into 10 envelopes. They would talk about finances and the importance of a budget and how easy it is to spend money and not know where it goes. We let them buy the cheap toys that break that they just had to have so they would learn from it. Plus that was a special trip on its own with one parent. We let them choose how to give with their tithe. LOTS of great interaction there as they chose to support missionaries, anonymously sent kids to church camp, supported a child through World Vision with a group of friends, etc. It all took talking through with a parent first, so win/win!
The only time I have for one on one is grocery shopping. It’s kind of lame, but each Saturday I take only one kid with me. They have fun being my helper and I try and make meaningful conversations during this time. They pick out the snacks, and what kind of yogurt. They’re young enough that they think it’s fun.
Every year when we are getting ready for school, i have started a new tradition where each of my kids picks a place to shop (we live in a small town so we have to drive to get to a mall), and they get to pick the restaurant, and we have a one on one day shopping and eating with mama! My kids absolutely love it, and it eliminated so much time waste!
Great ideas! We currently have 2 kids (8 and 5) so we do one on one fairly often with practices and errands. But we are starting the road to foster so I love the idea of getting a night to stay up later.
My kids are 9, 7, and 4, and I still think the best quality time spent with them is reading out loud to them. They love it and so do I!
How about: put the phone, book, computer, tv, whatever! down & TALK with your child? Not how was your day/what did you learn? but specific, open-ended questions: who did you play with at recess, what game/activities did y’all play (swings, red rover, etc.) what are y’all discussing in *certain subject? After decades in education, its astonishing and heartbreaking how many parents have & want so little involvement in their children’s lives anymore. I’m not talking helicopter parenting, but most these days don’t slow down & put their phones down long enough to read the expression on their child’s face! Glad to see that you spend quality time with each of your children, as it is absolutely critical to their development and future!
Mary Grace says
My husband and I take our children on individual dates each month. Sometimes we pick, sometimes they do. It can be simple like a walk or park play date or concert or overnight trip! As they have gotten older (3 teenagers & 2 have even moved out but still look forward to monthly quality time!) we’ve had to get creative as well as flexible. Sometimes one child wants one or more siblings to join them, or one parent vs both but somehow the schedule with 7 children ages 23-2years always works out, even with Daddy’s work/travel schedule. We just don’t have enough days in the week to do it weekly but we have lots of entire family time together, as well as smaller groups of children with activities & practices, etc. but most importantly, we have family then individual prayer EVERY single night. It is my favorite time! I’ve never regretted missing a tv show or “alone time” over praying with my family.
Caroline Long says
Read ‘the five Love Languages of Children’ by Gary Chapman and then you can determine what action speaks to them the best! Each child might like something different (acts of service, gifts, etc.)
Caroline Long says
Read ‘the five Love Languages of Children’ by Gary Chapman and then you can determine what action speaks to them the best! Each child might like something different (acts of service, gifts, etc.)
Shay, by making that extra effort, you are showing your kids so much love (and making great memories with them). I applaud you so much for doing that so intentionally.
We only have two kids & it was still difficult, but always a priority.
Even during our daughter’s last year of high school, we had “senior Wednesday” and one or both parents would take our daughter out and do something together on (most) Wednesday nights.
We do dates with the kids as well as one BIG trip when they are older. Here’s all about how we do quality time with not just the kids but with the whole family plus as husband and wife.
Jessica Beal says
I love all of the fun special one on one times, but in our everyday life with 5 kids, 3 of whom are very busy with sports, I have found I love driving them to their practices or wherever they need to be. I despised all of the running around at first, but decided to change my attitude and make it a chance for one on one time with them. Now I look forward to the drop-off and pick-ups with which ever kid has something. Each one is different. Sometimes we listen to their choice of music or we just talk. This is a way for me to connect daily, while we wait for those more special times to come.
Lisa Molnar says
We have 4 kids ages 11-16 and I have a rustic wood décor business so I struggle with fitting in one on one time for each of my kids. I decided to make the kids Gift of Time boxes for Valentines Day. I wrote special date card for every month and made these cute little Gift of Time boxes to put them in. The older kids LOVED this gift way more than I would have thought. I even gave one to my husband because I need to give him more one on one time too. 🙂 My friends liked the idea so much that now I am selling the Gift of Time Box in my CadesandBirch shop on Etsy. This is a gift for the kids, but it is also a way that I can keep myself accountable for giving individual time to each of my kiddos every month.
Lisa N says
I’m sure you’ve seen this idea but it wasn’t really a thing when my daughters were little, but young daddy’s at our church take their daughters on a daddy/daughter date. They get all dressed up and he rings the doorbell and gives her flowers and they go out to eat somewhere nice. Sometimes they even get a piece of jewelry. And it’s a chance to show them and talk to them about how they would like their daughters to be treated by a guy when the time comes. Of course this usually gets posted on social media:) This is usually just a once a year (or even if it’s one time only) event, but it would make a memory to cherish.
MEGAN Starr says
GRowing up with 4 kids in my family, my parents took an each away on our own vacation for our 10th birthday. It was a special bonding time and could be done at any age.
Felicia Nguyen says
Shay I am like you..I have 4 …they all go to the same school ..my husband works a lot so it’s mainly me and the 4 kids. I take my kids with me EVERYWHERE..girls trip to Destin..Vegas etc
But how I spend my individual time with each kid..
varies with the situation..I don’t have a routine..I just work with what I have..
1. I never miss a field trip with any of the kids..I find this is the best 1 in 1 with them.
2. I am room Mom or assistant room Mom for all my kids class so i am very involve and this gives me the opportunity to spend a lot of 1on 1 time with them in class or on class project..for ex: my 5 yr old ..they do lots of art n craft. Paint shirts to wear for a certain holiday, make Easter basket, Mardi Gras mask etc
3. My kids are all 2.5 yrs apart so they each like different things..so my oldest love to bake with me and so we would bake 2-3x a week. She is also at the concert age ..so we go to Taylor Swift concert and etc .. also many theater shows—Cats, Phatom of the Operas, Hampton etc
4. I take my son to all his football, soccer, cross Country, academic games (practices and games) so those are our times together. We play Minecraft together ..we go to this sky zone or laser tag once every month.
5. My daughter Chloe is 7 and she loves to read and draw..go to different shows and posh paint where we paint pottery or we just paint canvas at home on nights where there is no homework.
6. Vivian 5yr old.. i read to her EVERY night.. she is also my helper..every day when I am cooking..she sits on the island and watch me prep/cook etc
I also take her to the children museum or zoo
*** i try to schedule all of their doctors wellness or dentist/ortho, eye appt early/mid day so we have the rest of the day to hang out together..
My kids are very into movies so we usually hit a movie and lunch after one of their appts.
*** it’s not 1 on 1 but we have DINNER every night together. Where we sit down n eat n talk about our day..what’s coming up …. what’s happening at the school.. what they want to do for the weekend..where we want to go for our next vacation..
** main KEY POINT in our household ..NO ELECTRONICS on the breakfast, lunch, or dinner table.. when we sit down to eat.. we TALK and eat.
I’ve heard it suggested that a great way to do this is once a month on the date your child was born, but each month…only problem is my four birthday dates are all clumped at the beginning of the month!
I think your ideas are great and can’t wait to read through the comments. I just had my third and feel I’m going to have to be much more intentional. My son (just started Kinder) is asking for a “skip day” so he can just be with me since he hears about what his younger brother gets to do…I’ve never even mentioned a day like this to him but thought that was neat.
Coming from a grandparent- we can play a role in this too. On our grandchildrens’ birthdays we pick a weeken night usually a week after their birthday and celebrate with just them. They pick the activities, the restaurant , and their breakfast! We take them shopping to pick out their gift from us. They talk about this for weeks before. The restaurant often is a place they are curious about but have not been too. That can be interesting to say the least! It is as special for us as it is them! Grandparents are usually splitting their attention between children. When they were younger it was a special day only and as soon as they wanted to see mom, we took them home. Extra loving and cuddles and bedtime stories included! I think special aunts and uncles could do the same especially if grandparents are not close by or have passed away. Everyone wants to feel special, right?
Donna Cheatham says
A few ideas that take little or no money but in some cases LOTS of patience.
Take a walk, talk about observations-look for flags- flowers etc.
Go to library, when old enough have them fill out application for card- they will remember the 1st app they ever filled out was for library card
Practice doing nails at home, you can start with clear or light color on toes, teach them howto thread a needle, sew a bottom They will remember some of these moments forever. Go to $1 store, tell them they have a certain amount to spend STICK with that amount, have lots of patience, be of NO influence. Amazing , some with decide in 5 minutes, others much longer, some will buy only for self, some will also buy for others. Older girls, let them pick a lip balm or lip gloss. Again, stick to limit & no influence. Helps them in their decision learning & when you say something you mean it, if you say 3, you mean 3.
Nicole Buschlen says
I saw that it was already mentioned about but my daughter and I have notebook that we write in, draw in, ask questions in and we pass it back and forth. She is 14 and we’ve done this for several years and have several notebooks. When she was younger it was more fun drawings and knock knock jokes but as she has gotten older we are a little more serious and it has really encouraged some great conversations. The “mom I think its time for a bra” comment brought me to tears but turned into a great mother/daughter shopping trip. We don’t do it every night but the nights I find it on my pillow I really love. I have an older son I have found that breakfast trips to the local diner really give us a chance to talk. He’s thinking about graduation and college and I think that he likes this time to be vulnerable with just me. Love all the ideas.