Happy MARCH from Nantucket, friends!
I’m so excited it’s March 🙂 .
After two attempts to get on island in February, the third time was a charm. I came over yesterday to check on the house and cars and survey the situation after the blizzard. I am very excited to spend a minute here before heading back to Texas. I’ll get to enjoy a bit more winter weather before heading back to the sunshine.
I hope YOU all had a great weekend!
Today, we are going to discuss THE MOST POPULAR TOPIC IN MY DMS.
Period.
End of story.
Without a doubt.
Everyone has questions about…
…my hair.
Bahahahaha!
I mean, I can’t help but laugh.
I’m not sure I have a lot to say on the topic, but we can absolutely chat about it 🙂 .
Here I am on Nantucket in July 2018 living my best blonde girl life.
I started highlighting my hair when I was 12 years old and never considered other options.
I had light brownish/blondish hair as a kid and one day, my mom let me get a few blonde highlights, and I never looked back.
This was June 2023, and at this point, I had been blonde blonde for decades.
That summer, we didn’t leave Nantucket for two full months, and my roots started to grow out a bit. When I got back to Texas in August, I told my stylist that I liked the darker roots and maybe I should go darker. I’ve had the same hair stylist for 23 years, and she told me we could start going darker and to let her know when to stop.
Thus…
…(this was October 2023) very very gradually, I stopped adding all the blonde, allowed the darker to come through, and we kept going…
December 2023
March 2024
June 2024
At a certain point, she started actually adding in darker color (instead of just letting the natural come through and discontinuing the blonde highlights)…
August 2024…my hair needed more dimension than just a lot of roots and blonde ends as it was growing out…
October 2024…so she added in darker pieces with each visit.
December 2024
March 2025
June 2025
October 2025
And February 2026.
After two and a half years, we have arrived 🙂 .
See? It was a long process.
I am so happy though that we did it this way for many reasons:
1: It wasn’t as jarring. I wasn’t super blonde one day and then dark the next. I personally wouldn’t have loved that dramatic of a change.
2: I could have not liked it as we were movin’ along, and it would have been much easier to reverse course and go back.
3: My hair didn’t get damaged at all during the process.
So, that’s the little timeline of my journey from blonde to brunette 🙂 .
Now, to the age old question of whether blondes or brunettes have more fun?
Well, in my little old opinion, blondes do because being a brunette has turned into more maintenance. Bahahaha! I mean, maybe if I were naturally a brunette, it would be less work but goodness, I thought maintaining blonde was upkeep, but maintaining brunette has been way more work. I’m happy to do it, but I am surprised by it.
Because my roots now grow in lighter than my actual hair color, one can tell easier (it starts to look like my hair is thinning at the crown when it’s really just the lighter hair coming in…the reverse of what happened when I was blonde), so instead of getting my hair highlighted every 6 to 7 weeks, I’m now getting my hair colored every four. I did NOT see that coming.
I’ve also noticed that things like dry shampoo show up in my hair when, back in the day, I never saw that with blonde hair. I’ve changed to a DARK TONES dry shampoo.
Here’s the deal, I feel totally and completely like myself with the darker hair. Right this minute, I cannot imagine going back. At 44 years old, I feel like I finally found “my color”. Now, after almost 19 years of blogging, I’ve written a few posts on “things I’ve said I’d never do and ended up doing”…so, I’m wise enough to know “never say never”. Right now, this feels like me. And I like feeling like me.
I hope that answers some of your questions about my hair. Of course, if you have more, feel free to comment, and I’ll answer them.
Now, don’t forget, in August, I shared…
This post has every step (plus photos!) from the very beginning to the end, so if you want to know the deets on how I wash/dry/style my hair, HEAD HERE NOW.
This brunette is off to enjoy a wonderful winter day on Nantucket.
Wishing you the BEST Monday! xx
Diane Moore says
You have so much natural body to your hair. I look better less light, shall we say, but nothing gives heavy hair body the way bleach does!
Enjoy your time up north and safe travels!
Elspeth Mizner says
Enjoy your time in Nantucket! Stay warm!
http://www.elspethsdaybyday.com
Lindi says
Hair post was interesting! Definitely a slow process
Back to your dog post! We’re super close to getting a dog. First dog ever for our family. I’ve been having stress dreams about it. People say you get the puppy blues- basically grieving your old way of life before you are tied down with a dog. Any truth to this? We love flexibility and taking trips and things. Our kids are old enough that we can do anything we want as a family. I’m worried about this. Any thoughts anyone?
Mix and Match Mama says
I’ve never heard it phrased that way, but I actually think that’s a pretty spot on phrase. It absolutely *could* happen. Getting a puppy is like getting a baby. They require a lot more attention, time, care and detail. They can’t be alone long, they make messes, they require you to lose sleep and get up in the night, but goodness, THEY GIVE SO MUCH LOVE AND JOY (just like a baby). I am such a dog person and have had so much experience that I haven’t had the blues, but my bestie got her first dog two years ago and totally did. Now, he’s the love of her life, but it took her a lot of time and patience to get there. All of that to say, having a pet might not be the right decision for your family, AND THAT’S OKAY TOO. They’re work and they’re expensive, and if you’re not ready to go all in 100%, it’s okay to say it’s not for you.
Adrienne N says
As a married person with no kids and a husband who travels a lot, I was terrified of the exact same thing! The first year was tough. I felt like I was never going to go anywhere ever again. BUT what saved the day for me was working out routine/budgeting – I have a trustworthy friend that we trade dog sitting when one of us wants to travel or I have a boarder I am very comfortable with that my dog loves. Travel takes more planning and logistics, but the freedom came back once I found those options where I feel my dog is safe and well loved when I do travel.
Kristen says
I was never a dog person and it took me 3 years of researching to finally commit. Now, that dog is the love of my life and I can’t imagine life w/out her. But… .it is a different dynamic and the only thing that has been an issue is that our family travels a lot! I don’t have family super close by that can watch her and I do have to rely on neighbors to come over and let our dog out if I am out longer than planned. My advice is to make sure you have a dog sitter lined up. It’s been 8 yrs w/ our dog and I still haven’t found a great sitter that I love besides family.
Allison says
Hi, my fiance has a dog so when we started dating I got thrown into the dog life (he is a puppy) and it definitely adds another thing you have to think about. When we go on trips who is going to watch the dog, when we want to do something we have to take into account how long well be gone, and if the dog sheds you will be vacuuming every other day butttttt the puppy has so much love. There is nothing like coming home and being greeted by a very happy puppy!
Natasha says
I’ve never gotten a pet (besides a pet) but my best friend said having a puppy was like having a newborn but people didn’t support you in the same way with meals and help and chances to nap. She said she definitely struggled for the first year. I hadn’t know any of this (about having a puppy) before she got her puppy.
Anna says
Hi! I have an idea for you! Could you watch a friend’s dog when they leave town? Then you could kind of “trial” having a dog for a while (a week might be a good amount of time?). It is surprising how much time a dog needs and you really can’t leave your house all day, for example, because the dog needs to be let outside, and they are social animals that get lonely. You might try it and decide you love it! Or you might realize it’s not a good fit for your life right now. Just an idea! 🙂 As a dog lover, I’m really happy to adjust my schedule around my dog because it’s SO worth it to me, but others won’t feel the same and I think it’s important to make the decision that’s the best for your stage of life right now.
Mix and Match Mama says
I love this idea!!!
Denise M. says
Maybe you could foster a dog before getting your own? Then you/your family could truly see what it would be like before getting your own. Good luck!
Amber says
It looks great! I gradually went browner, to my natural light brown as a girlie, like you, has been getting blonde highlights since high school. Well I did not feel like myself as a light brunette. I gave it time but went back and got some natural blonde highlights and felt as if I was BACK! Isn’t it funny how we just know what feels like us?
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank YOU! And we certainly do 🙂
Lisa D says
It’s funny how, as women age, we just “know” what feels right.
I’ve been getting brown low-lights for years now to cover the gray! My natural hair color growing up was dark brown but it’s lightened as I’ve aged. It does require more maintenance but I’m not ready to go completely to my natural hair color so brown low-lights it is!
Happy Monday 😊
Sheaffer says
Okay…..it’s so weird….seeing the blonde pics now feels jarring. Like who is that blonde chick?!? 😉
Mix and Match Mama says
Riiiiiiiight?! 😉
Kathy says
You are so lovely either way, but I miss the blonde❤️
Kristen says
Love it brunette.. I slowly went back to my natural color the past two years too but I have noticed that my grey’s are so much more noticeable so I have to add some blonde back in so I am not there every 4 weeks!! I need low maintenance!!
Allison says
I love that you did it gradually. You’re right, it would have been very jarring if you did it at once lol!
Mix and Match Mama says
And I probably wouldn’t have liked it. I needed to grow into it myself.
Lauren Palomo says
You look beautiful as a blonde and a brunette! I’ve read your blog since 2012, and what a natural transition you’ve made. Your blog is a happy place each morning no matter the color of your hair lol!
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank YOU!! I am so very grateful for you, Lauren! So, so, so grateful!
Christina says
Great! Now tell your sweet sweet readers about those extensions and how those factored in.
Mix and Match Mama says
These comments always make me laugh because you can clearly see my hair growing in every single picture. You have every right to believe what you want though. It’s none of my business if you want to be wrong 😉 .
Laura says
Also… if you did get extensions, who cares! That could be fun to do, too!
Mix and Match Mama says
It would give me something to blog about, haha! Right? 😉
Paula Hobbs says
I transitioned mine recently too! I just wanted to stop using the harsh bleach, etc. to maintain “blonde” when as I get older my hair is darker and darker. I’m still a few visits away from my dark goal, but I definitely feel “more me” again! As a 48 year young woman, it’s just easier to embrace reality and be more natural. Yes, the maintenance is a little more, especially as the greys creep in LOL 🙂 Thanks for sharing your hair journey, it’s beautiful!! Also, I’m on year #2 with my Nutrafol and it’s truly a game changer!!
Mix and Match Mama says
ISN’T IT?! I cannot praise Nutrafol enough!
SS says
Shay,
I was just thinking the other day…wow her hair looks a lot darker. 😆
I have only used a box semi permanent color years ago (like high school) other than that it is all natural. My cousin who has been my hair person since high school (before she actually went to cosmetology school) never pushes me into anything. I have donated a lot of ponies over the years…she said Oh these places love your hair because you have never colored it. Lol. So I just keep enjoying my new and more frequent highlights of white or as my family calls it Frost or icing.. 😆
Margie says
You look lovely. I love that you’re open to changing, growing, learning, reading, traveling, different cultures, learning about history, being curious, trying new things…. Wonderful!
Alyssa says
Did Kensington follow the same process as you did? Y’all look great in your photos from the cheerleader banquet.
Mix and Match Mama says
No, she plopped down in the chair and asked for the dramatic change. Ha!
Leslie S says
In the process of allowing my brunette to make a reappearance – not sure I’ll ever go back to brunette totally tho bc, for me, brown hair color (Ive tried semi and permanent hair colors) makes me feel flat, dull and like Elvira. So I’m sure I’ll keep some blonde highlights to blend the grays and embrace them somewhat too. Isn’t it fun getting older and figuring out what works for “this season” of life with a different outlook?
Tina says
I’m glad you are doing what you enjoy with your hair color. I’m naturally strawberry blonde and I hated the red in my hair growing up. As I went more gray my stylist suggested blonde highlights and I prefer the lighter color. I have a few friends that suggest red highlights as well but every time I try it I hate how they look. Hair and grow out is so much work. Now I only do highlights twice a year. I think I feel about the hair salon like you do the dentist. It takes so much time, but is necessary.
One thought with your dramatic change, I would love to see you try a more coral or nude lip shade. I think it would suit your darker hair color more than your beloved St Germaine. Just the two cents you did not ask for from a long time reader on a Monday morning. Enjoy Nantucket!
Mix and Match Mama says
It’s not Saint Germaine 😉
Tricia says
Oooh please share the color!! I’m a big St. Germaine fan – from you! I too have started going darker, with my hair color so I’d love to know the new color!!
Mix and Match Mama says
MAC’s Snob 🙂
Tricia says
THANK YOU!!
Pam E. says
Just curious Shay, what your natural hair color is? And if it’s brown why color at all? I know what you mean by a process! I colored my brown hair for years until pre mature gray came on with a vengeance and started the process of transitioning to letting it be natural. It took a few years to recognize myself but wouldn’t go back now! Your hair looks very healthy and beautiful.
Mix and Match Mama says
I have no idea what color it truly is? I would guess some sort of light brown? Heck, it could be gray, I haven’t unearthed it in such a long time.
Dee says
As someone who’s farther along in the gray stage, I’m always envying the blondes because it’s harder to tell when gray comes in and even when they stop coloring, it still seems blonde to me. I just do a non-permanent light brown color so it’s lighter than my medium brown but gives me highlights of sorts.
I had the same question as to wouldn’t it be less maintenance to go to your natural color but you should do you.
Lois says
“I haven’t unearthed it in such a long time”. hahaha Like that. ; )
Kristen says
I love the darker hair! It’s so funny thought because when I see a picture of you, I still expect to see the blonde! LOL!
Mix and Match Mama says
My parents say that every single time they see me…even though they saw me the week before. Bahaha!
Swopoe says
So why did Kensington change her hair color too?
Mix and Match Mama says
She was inspired. Blonde isn’t the only choice. Who knew?! 😉
Priscilla says
Why not go with just your natural color?
Mix and Match Mama says
I’m sure I passed it along the way, but I didn’t love it enough to stop and stay awhile 😉 .
Karen says
I love this response!! I was a curly headed blonde til college and it went darker until I was roommates with a hairdresser for 7 years. Started highlighting then as her guinea pig while she was in beauty college…ended up with tiger stripes one time (we were drinking wine…never again!). She turned out be an excellent hairstylist and I profited for many years until she changed professions. Now, I high and low light to cover the gray but my once extremely thick hair has thinned, so am considering the Nutrafol, wondering if there are any health concerns taking something like that?
Mix and Match Mama says
Head to their website and take a look, but it’s been nothing but miraculous for me! I’ve been on it now almost three years!
Tish says
Love your darker hair, Shay. I find my hair is healthier adding in darker low lights than when I added blonde highlights. It was hard on my fine hair. Styling question – I read your hair routine post. Do you curl away from your face or towards your face? Especially how do you curl around your face? I love the way it looks!
Mix and Match Mama says
It’s a miss mash. I curl away most of the time, but I add some before just to give it a little variety…it’s a random little combo
Tasha says
Hi Shay! Thanks for sharing. I noticed Kensington’s hair looks darker lately as well, was that something she decided to do with you?
Mix and Match Mama says
She did her hair overnight this fall. I think she realized one day that blonde wasn’t the only way, so she changed it up. She could totally go back, but right now, she’s enjoying the darker hair 🙂 .
Sil says
Happy Monday and Happy March!!
I have to tell you I have been reading Mix and Match Mama for many years, since you were a family of four. I look forward to your posts and feel like we are friends even though you don’t know me! I should tell you that I am not known for being very observant, but still, you would think I would notice your hair changing colors through the years and I did not really put it together AT ALL!!! I would guess if it had been overnight and all at once, I would have noticed. Looking at the pictures you posted and the difference I am astonished that I didn’t pick up on it. Suffice to say you are beautiful no matter your hair color and if you feel more like yourself with darker hair then that is wonderful!! Thanks so much for sharing!! It is such a pleasure starting my days with you!
Mix and Match Mama says
You are TOO TOO KIND! Thank YOU!
K.K. says
Okay, you’ve probably been asked this before, but just curious. What would you say your natural color is now? Something like the roots in the March 2024 picture? I’m sure that would be pretty too! But also, yes, I love that you’ve found the color that is “you”!!
Mix and Match Mama says
I would guess it’s some sort of light brown. I think only God knows the real answer.
K.K. says
ha ha ha!! 🙂 Love it.
Alison says
I think you’re incredibly beautiful as both a blonde and a brunette! But I think the brunette look makes your eyes sparkle more. We’re only a year apart. And for me, as a 45-year-old mom, I think any time our eyes can sparkle instead of look tired, we’re winning. 😉 Your darker look is perfect for this stage of life!
Lea Ansamaa says
Love the brunette! I am in that same process….but I am growing out my natural own color which is light brown. I am so waiting for the day I don’t have to dye my hair again! Byt it takes YEARS so here we go….But I will not go back to blonde either!
Connie says
I love your hair!! Enjoy your time in Nantucket!! I would love to travel as much as you do! 💕
Mandie Howard says
You are so beautiful, I’m sure any hair color would look great! I do think the brown makes everything pop in a great way! Maybe now you should try red! 😆
Kara says
I love it darker!! It looks so healthy! I was also a chronic highlighter (even at one point bleached it all to be VERY blonde) since 8th grade but now I am loving my “natural” color… a random shade of brown.. but it is nice to not have roots!! Colleen Rothschild shampoo/cond has also made a huge difference in my hair! Thanks for introducing me to her brand!! Funny side note: my 7 year old daughter always wants to use my shower b/c she likes my shampoo/cond so looks like she will have to start getting her own CR set! 🙂
Jen says
Is your natural hair color somewhere between the blonde and the current brunette? I would have never guessed that the darker hair would be more upkeep. But it totally makes sense if your natural color is lighter. My hairdresser was saying that this is the reason that some of her clients will go lighter as they start getting gray is because darker hair requires so much more maintenance. You have beautiful hair at every stage, but I loved your beachy waves.
Mix and Match Mama says
Yes, it’s darker than blonde but lighter than this. Thank YOU!
Amy Grace Duncan says
I love the brown on you!!! It looks super natural and chic. I think it goes really well with your skin tone, too. I’ve heard that the color matching service, “House of Color” will tell you not only what colors look best on you for clothing, but they advise for makeup and hair colors also! I’m interested in figuring out what the best tones are for myself, too.
Christina says
I have loved watching your hair transition! You look great the whole way through. It might be just me, but I think your eyes pop! with the darker hair. Have a wonderful time in Nantucket!
Elizabeth L says
I LOVE your brown hair! I was curious to see if you were going to mention that its actually more work. I’m naturally light brown, but had to start gradually going blonde years ago because my greys were getting so hard to cover. I love my hair girl, and I love my blonde, but I do sometimes miss my brown hair! I know that if I went brown I’d have to go every 4 weeks versus 8 or 10 and being in the little kid season of life (newborn next month, 3 year old, and 6 year old) I could never make that work. But honestly, this post kind of gave me hope that maybe later down the line I could go back to brown if I wanted to and had the time for the maintenance. Anyways, thanks for sharing the transition. I love it!
Carolyn says
You always look amazing, and are great as either a blonde or brunette. I have a similar natural hair color as you, but I am older. And I will say that that as you age, it is MUCH easier to hide the gray with blonde highlights! I used to have to get my blonde highlights every 4 to 6 weeks, and now I can easily go 6 to 8 weeks. Something to think about in the future!!!
Sarah says
I love your hair darker! It looks so good!
Beth Knecht says
Enjoy Nantucket so much!
I hope you share a little recap here, as I gave up Insta scrolling for Lent.
I also love that you make time for yourself, time with your friends and time with your husband! Learning quickly that as moms we need time for us too!
Sarah says
Hey Shay! Can you share who your hair stylist is? I’ve been looking for a new person!
Mix and Match Mama says
Sure! Email me, and I’ll give you her phone number! mixandmatchmama@yahoo.com 🙂
Susan says
Can you please link/name the store the khaki zip up sweater is from in the February 2026 photo? Thanks!
Mix and Match Mama says
Of course! https://go.shopmy.us/p-45541096
Sarah Shaneyfelt says
I love that you did this gradually so that you! I loved you as blonde but I also think the shade of brown that you’re at right now is absolute perfection on you! I had been seeing brown hair on everyone this past summer, so I thought about it a ton–when I had my hair color appointment back in October, I told her I wanted to go dark brown and that I had really put some thought into it, so I wanted the big change. Turns out, I love it! Mine is my natural hair color and it really threw my husband for a loop when I came home because he had never seen me as a brunette…I had been blonde for so long!
MeetTheShaneyfelts
Kristen says
Hi- quick question. Love to hear how Andrew, your parents and your kids like the brown hair? Do they like you blonder or brown?
Mix and Match Mama says
They all seem to wonder what took me so long. Ha!
Allena says
My hair is a VERY dark brown (my kids always get confused when I say this because they would say it’s black…but it really isn’t ha), and the grays are coming in fast and furious and I’m trying to embrace it because I don’t want to deal with the upkeep. I get compliments on the color, but it still feels jarring to look in the mirror and see so much white! (Dang genetics that my older sister has less gray!) Question for you – I’ve started HRT and am maybe seeing some hair loss (I think from the testosterone) and was thinking about trying Nutrafol. I think you used to have a coupon code (maybe I’m wrong) – do you anymore?
Mix and Match Mama says
I don’t think it’s active right now, but let me see!