I am sure I don’t have the right words for today and am certain, I will somehow screw this up, but I just wanted to start by saying that I love each and every one of you. I am constantly surprised by how much my love for you grows because no matter the situation, you always rise to the occasion.
Thank you for sharing your prayer requests with me.
I wrote every single one of them down and have been praying for them every day…and will continue to pray for them. I know people handle all situations differently, but praying is always my foundation. My inbox is always open if you need someone to pray for you and with you over any situation. mixandmatchmama@yahoo.com
I also want to act. I want to better myself, I want to better my kids, I want to be a better mother, daughter, friend and human, and I want to make sure I’m doing what I can in order to end racial injustice on my end. I want to grow and mature and over the years, I feel like I really have. I don’t think it’s fair to ask people to change/open their minds and hearts and then when they do, criticize them for who they were before…change is change, so hope when you see me and other people change and expand a bit, you see the growth appreciate that (while also keeping in mind that you guys see a little snippet of people’s lives online and not the whole thing). The older I get, I hope the wiser and more compassionate I get. I love my black friends, I’m thankful for their friendships and want to make sure I’m standing with them and supporting them. I also support and love my friends who are in public service too. I love, respect and want nothing but the best for everyone.
My heart is to always be a place of light on the sometimes dark internet, and I don’t want you to come here every day and not get a few minutes of reprieve from the heaviness, but there are ways I can incorporate bettering myself, educating my family and at the same time, hopefully encouraging you! . These might seem minor, but I keep thinking if we all take little steps in the right direction, they can add up to big changes. I am determined to bring you happiness this week and smiles. I don’t like when I don’t feel connected with you, so this week, I hope we can connect over coffee and bring smiles to each other’s faces in-between the heaviness that’s around us.
Two things to note before we get to this week’s meal plan…
…I added a fourth book to Shay’s Summer Book Club: June Edition! If you missed this announcement on Monday (on Instagram), the book White Fragility was the number one recommend book this week for me to read, and I read it in two days! Right now, it’s sold out, but hopefully you can either check it out at the library or download it to your e-reader (which is what I did!) or it maybe it will be back in stock soon! We’re not going to discuss it now (we’re saving that for book club day!), but I hope you read it this month too.
The second thing is…
…this Wednesday, Erika and I are hosting Let’s Look and have decided to change the prompt to “Let’s Look at how we can make sure we’re encouraging racial equality at home” . If you’re a blogger, we’d love for you to link up, and then on that day, I would love for all of you to share podcasts, influencers, books, kid reads, TV shows, movies and more that encourage diversity in your own homes. I just refuse to believe I can’t make changes (no matter what they are!) in my own life and with my own family.
Speaking of my own life…I’m ready to jump in to one of my favorite things in my life.
Food.
I have this week’s Meal Planning Monday!
Friends! It’s JUNE!!!
It’s also the second week of SUMMER over here, and we are enjoying it already! This week’s menu has a summer flair. Um, did you see that there is a grilled peach on that burger?! YES! You need to try it!!
Here’s hoping wherever you are, you have that summer feelin’ in your life too. Happy Monday! xo
My Sheet Tray Supper with Sausage, Sweet Potatoes & Brussels Sprouts couldn’t be simpler. Throw everything on the sheet, roast, eat and toss the foil as your clean up. Easy as that for a Monday night!
Have you tried my Roasted Red Pepper Tostadas with a Black Bean Mash yet? So many yummy flavors…one easy to pull together dish!
Mmmm…I was feeling my Roasted Chicken and Sweet Potato Risotto this week! Sounds fancy, looks fancy, yet…it’s so SIMPLE!!
Nothing says summer quite like my Pineapple Grilled Shrimp! Serve it over rice and you’ll feel like you’re on vacation.
And wrap up your week with my Gorgonzola & Grilled Peach Burger! Nothing says June quite like PEACHES! Speaking of which…
…you should try my Peach Pie for dessert!
Happy Monday, friends! I hope you have the BEST day!
Ahna @ Hammers N Hugs says
Amen to it all – prayer, change, racial equality, sunshine, and delicious food. Happy Monday!!
Denise says
Thank you. I wasn’t really sure what else to say. Im not one to respond or put myself out there. This isn’t the first time we’ve been faced with similar situations, but the most impactful in recent history. I am an emotional person and have cried more tears than I care to share. I read your blog daily. I’ve learned, tried recipes, and laughed… As a biracial mother of a young African American man, I need a place to ‘get away’ and your blog has done that for me. Being in a constant state of fear when he walks out the door is hard. Strangers who see him dont see his compassion, respect, ambition and Master Degree education. It absolutely touched my heart to see you acknowledge the situation….that’s all I personally can ask for, obviously just my opinion, for people to see and recognize and care. I understand why bloggers and other influencers may be afraid to say anything, worried to lose a certain demographic or anger others. But I’ve been overwhelmed with appreciation for women / people who are willing to listen and learn. I can just pray that we are heading in the right direction, equality for all. Again, thank you and I’m so glad to have you back.
Mix and Match Mama says
God bless you, Denise. I’m so thankful to have you as a sweet reader. xo
Eve McCarey says
Thank you so much for posting this. I really appreciate how you are open to change and how you are sharing this with your readers.
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank you, Eve!!!
Erika Slaughter says
Happy, Happy Monday, Friend! This post reminds me I have to head to the grocery store. Womp. Womp.
Mix and Match Mama says
Me too. Maybe I’ll see you there 😉 .
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog says
Don’t be too hard on yourself, Shay! We’re all learning to be better one way or another. Thanks for the recipes! ✨
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
Mix and Match Mama says
Charmaine, you’re one of my favorites. Thank YOU!
Sarah Shaneyfelt says
I love that you mention the fact that people will change so don’t criticize who they were before. It makes me think of the apostle Paul and how he made the biggest change in life! He always referenced his past just to show the miracle God performed in changing his heart–not to dwell on who he used to be. Here’s to God changing hearts everywhere!!
https://meettheshaneyfelts.com/2020/06/items-ive-bought-recently-from-amazon-that-i-love.html
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank you, Sarah!!!!
Sarah M. says
What a thoughtful post! I particularly like the line that we ask people to change and then criticize for the person they used to be. If people own their mistakes then we have to let them move on. I typically try not to see things in terms of regret but recognizing that was who I was at the time I made that choice but I learned from it. Looking forward to linking up with you on Wednesday.
It’s my birthday tomorrow (like Ashby!!) and on my blog today I’ve asked people to make donations to black and indigenous causes in their own area. Is welcome you to do the same (www.torontosam.ca)
Mix and Match Mama says
What a wonderful idea, Sarah!! And happy early birthday!!! You June 9th people are special 🙂 .
Jennifer Baker says
Hi Shay! I have never been more proud to be a member of your community. Last week was life changing for me and I am committed to learning, listening and growing to become anti-racist. I can not wait for book club day because I am soaking up White Fragility. Thank you for using your platform, I am on this life journey with you.
Mix and Match Mama says
I’m so glad you read it too!!! I’m even more excited about book club now!!
Liz Thorson says
You are such a compassionate, loving person, Shay. I have so much respect for your goal to continue to educate yourself, sharing your vulnerability and desire to be open to change through the acceptance of new thoughts and information. Your family and friends are so lucky to be a part of your life.
So you want to talk about race, by Oluo, might be a book you’d be interested in reading, too. I’m planning on reading White Fragility soon.
Jaime Matherson says
Hi we have a peach allergy in our house. Is there a substitute fruit you would recommend for the peach burger?:) It looks amazing!
Mix and Match Mama says
Grill pineapple instead!!
Kelly says
Thank you Shay! It was too heavy for me to even look at anything news, social media etc last week, so I’m so relieved to have a bright spot in my day to read your blog and think of what recipe of yours I’ll be cooking tonight! That peach burger is calling my name! Thank you fir sharing your beautiful family and a slice of your wonderful life with us ?
Mix and Match Mama says
If you make that burger, let me know 🙂 . It is always one of my faves!! xo
Elspeth says
This is so important!!! I’ve missed you this past week but happy you are back. Thank you for sharing your words, your prayers and your love with us all!!!
http://www.elspethsdaybyday.com
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank YOU!!
Barb says
I try to look at change like bearing fruit for the kingdom. We’ll never do it perfectly but if we do it increasingly then we’re on the right path. Your blog is a bright part of my every morning!!
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank you so much, Barb!
Sheaffer Sims says
ROASTED RED PEPPER TOSTADAS? YES
A BURGER WITH GORGONZOLA AND A PEACH? TOTALLY WEIRD. BUT YES.
And now I’m starving.
Mix and Match Mama says
You make me laugh so much!
Mary says
Thank you so much for using your platform in this way, Shay. I think you are going to open a lot of hearts and minds. You are always a light, even when discussing heavy issues.
Joan W says
So glad to see you back! It’s wonderful and admirable the way you have left yourself open to growth and change especially here in a ‘public’ forum, sharing it with your readers. It was especially fine that you thought immediately about how to bring your kids into this learning process too.
Megan says
Thank you for posting this! White Fragility is sold out at major retailers, but there are several small, black owned, bookstores that still have it in stock and offer shipping! Mahogany Books in DC is one I know of but there are several others as well! In case people want to start reading now and support a small business!
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Arika says
THANK YOU for adding White Fragility this month. Thank you, thank you. I hope many of your followers are willing to read it.
Mix and Match Mama says
Me too!!
Jen B says
We are all a work in progress! I read a quote that really spoke to me, “What if instead of longing for ease, we were made for more– made to advocate, made to dig in, made to speak out, made for complexity, made for this moment? What if we believed so deeply in our own capacity to rise to this occasion that getting to work wasn’t a tiring chore, but a life-giving opportunity to invest in something larger than ourselves?” That’s from Austin Channing Brown, the woman whose book was just picked for Reese Witherspoon’s Book Club. I don’t know about you – but I’m inspired! I’m going to pick it up.
Mix and Match Mama says
Oh my gosh, I just saw that book and it’s out of stock on Amazon! How cool is that?!
Anna Zeck says
Proud of you, Shay!!! You’re doing great.
Amy Knight says
Shay,
You ARE such a light for the kingdom. I can Hear your heart in this post. Thankful for you.
Melanie M. says
Thank you for sharing your heart…..which you always do. You have always been a light on the Internet. I don’t follow many people but have followed you for a long time with no intention of stopping. I also follow Catherine and Sean and they always make me smile! Your whole family is a blessing!
Mix and Match Mama says
Thank you so much, Melanie!! xo
Ellibelle says
That peach pie looks delicious!! Thanks for sharing!
Ellibelle’s Corner
Jenny says
Your heart shines right through this post! Happy June!!
denise says
“I don’t think it’s fair to ask people to change/open their minds and hearts and then when they do, criticize them for who they were before.” My boss and I were just talking about this very thing. It makes you feel that change–real change–can never come because you have to continually go back and defend not only your actions but your great-great-great grandfather’s actions. We have to confess and then repent. One without the other is useless. But then we should be able to go forward and create a better world for our “children and their children and their children.”
JSL says
Please consider for yourself – and encourage your blog/IG followers – to read some of the following authors, black conservatives for their counterbalanced perspective to white privilege and race discussions: Thomas Sowell (he has written 40 books and how many ppl even know who he is? or his books?), Burgess Owens, Candace Owens, Larry Elder, Kathy Barnette, Allen B. West, Horace Cooper… the list goes on (and, its a long list!) Plus, another author to read to offer a counterbalance perspective to the policing issue, Heather Mac Donald. Last week she wrote a WSJ op ed article, and has several books focusing on racial/gender/sexual orientation diversity issues (esp on race based admissions in American colleges)
STEPHANIE SANDERS says
JSL, thank you for acknowledging those authors and leaders too. I just starting following them this past week. Very good perspectives. I hope Shay will mention them also. Shay, you have such a large platform and are able to bring to light all sides.
JSL says
Heather Mac Donald’s comments submitted to House Judiciary and Judiciary GOP in response to today’s hearing on policing practices in America:
https://www.city-journal.org/repudiate-the-anti-police-narrative
An interview with Robin DiAngelo, author of White Fragility, Why ‘I’m Not Racist’ Isn’t Good Enough:
https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a32784598/what-white-people-can-do-racism-robin-diangelo/
Lisa says
Hi Shay! I shared some things this morning that I’ve been doing on my blog in order to keep learning and take action. https://www.lisabythesea.com/post/what-you-have-to-give
Mix and Match Mama says
Awesome, Lisa! Thank you!!
Mary says
Amen to prayer being the foundation. ❤️❤️ I will be adding that book to my list. Thank you for sharing!
Lois Hilty says
Did you not post last week on your blog? I didn’t see anything all week, & I missed you. Were you well?
Mix and Match Mama says
I missed you too, Lois! I’ll be posting this week. Thank you for checking on me! We are all fine. xo
Jaren says
I always gain a little something from your posts each time I read one. My go-to is always prayer and I’m looking forward to all the action steps I can learn too! Thanks for your words! I know I can come here for fun, wisdom from you and other moms, and good food!
Julie says
Love you Shay. Love that you share your heart with us and encourage us to be better right along side you. Missed you last week!!
Lisa D says
It’s brave to look at our hearts, attitudes, and actions, and see where we can do better. I am asking God to direct me. I am probably a bit older than the typical blog readers here and I can say that I truly want to age gracefully and gratefully. I, too, strive to be a light in a dark and sometimes lonely world. You are right… it takes small steps to make any sort of progress and change. Let’s keep trying. God bless.
Amanda @ That Inspired Chick says
Very well said. ❤ That Inspired Chick
Allena says
I read White Fragility about 18 months ago and loved it and learned so much from it and even messaged you on IG when you added this book to your June book club about it being a great choice. Food for thought – I saw a post over the weekend on IG about reading anti-racism books by black authors since a white author wouldn’t know how racism feels. What I liked about White Fragility was it definitely speaks to a white person recognizing it’s not enough to say you aren’t racist and all the ways we perpetuate racism just due to the way our society and systems are set-up. BUT I did think there was a valid point to reading books about anti-racism from the people who are experiencing racism. I’ve read 5 other anti-racism books by Black authors, too, and I’ve learned from all of them. Just wanted to pass along what I read because it definitely made me pause and think for a minute. I am so excited to see what you can do with your platform and looking forward to growing with you!
Jen W says
I love your honesty and how you share your heart. I think it’s been on all our minds on how we can be better these past couple weeks. I’ve also got a mixed racial family. My husband is black And I get scared of the world they are growing up in sometimes. I do my best to teach my girls just to love but I like how you put the emphasis on how people can change. I think that’s important to remember and to have a forgiving heart with it. I’m 2/3 into the summer book club and it’ll be interesting to try this new pick especially with what’s going on in the world. Thanks for sharing it with us.
Deb Small says
Shay,
I have a recommendation for you and your readers who might want to dive a little deeper into these issues. It comes from my good friend, Gerardo Marti. It is a 5 week online course called “What Lies Between Us: Fostering First Steps Towards Racial Healing “. It deals with addressing racial issues and came out of the cry for racial reconciliation within communities of believers. As a believer, sometimes we really want to see social issues discussed while seen through the lens of faith that is an integral part of who we are. Gerardo is an amazing, godly believer. If he recommends it, it comes with rigorous academic and spiritual scrutiny from someone who was a pastor (at Calvary Church in Santa Ana and Mosaic in Los Angeles) before leaving California to teach Sociology (at Davidson College) with an emphasis on race and religion. With so many suggestions out there, I thought I’d add this to the conversation. 🙂
Deb Small says
The course “What Lies Between Us: Fostering Steps to Racial Reconciliation can be found at Brownicity.com
Suzanne says
My Black (capitalized deliberately) friends have told me they think the book White Fragility is not the best read for us right now. It is written by a white author. We should be listening to and learning from Black authors. Here’s a link to an article that tells more about why the book is problematic. https://newdiscourses.com/2020/06/problem-white-fragility/ Instead, they recommend the book How to Be an Antiracist, by Ibram X. Kendi.