Top Five, Bottom Five: TEENAGERS

Happy Thursday, friends!

I just love a Thursday 🙂 .

Sip that PSL and settle in. It’s another edition of…

And today, it’s all about…TEENAGERS!

I have loved every stage of parenting. None of them have been perfect, but I have found a lot of joy in each stage.

In fact, you know how it goes…I’m always sad when one chapter of parenting ends because I always think the next one “can’t be as good”, but after 18 years, I have learned that there is joy in every chapter.

Today, I thought I’d focus on those teens…

…because I have a lot of them 🙂 .

I made me a little list of my TOP FIVE and BOTTOM FIVE aspects to raising teenagers.

I’ll share my list, and then I hope you share yours too!

Of course, I’m going to keep this light and fun because these kiddos are a gift.

Here we go, these are my TOP FIVE FAVORITE THINGS ABOUT RAISING TEENAGERS…

#5: THEY ARE REALLY FUNNY

Teenagers crack me up. My teens are funny, my kids’ friends are funny. Their wit and charm and sense of humor keep me laughing. Little kiddos are funny in their own way, but teenagers can be downright hysterical. Not only are they funny, but they (finally) get my humor too which makes them extra fun to be around. Teenage topics can be heavy, so I think it’s a bonus that we can often temper the heavy with the funny. It’s such a nice balance.

#4: THEY ARE SO SO HELPFUL

Little kids are not helpful. Teenage kids are crazy helpful. I remember when they were all younger, we used to joke that we needed another adult living in our house. There weren’t enough hands on deck, and we could easily feel outnumbered. All of a sudden (and it did happen really fast), these teens arrived and instead of needing us to help them bathe, buckle up, tie shoes, reach the cups, etc,…they turned into humans who could take out the trash, do their own laundry, run to the grocery store to grab us milk, walk the dogs…holy cow, it’s so easy!

Anytime we are with my extended family, Andrew and I get our cuddles in with the smaller kids. We enjoy every minute of that little kid time, but then we always joke that when the family is all going home to get their “bedtime routine” going, we are just having to worry about ourselves. I loved bath time and story time and sing songs time and tuck you in time and yes, I loved it all. It’s not too shabby just getting yourself to bed though. You kind of forget how indulgent that is when you’re in the trenches with small kids…but you get it back when you have teens.

#3: THEIR “THINGS” ARE JUST SUPER FUN

Teenagers “things” are just super fun. Their sporting events are fun. Their hobbies are fun. It’s just all so much fun to experience and do these “things” with these older people. I’ve always loved traveling with my kids, but traveling with teens is a new, super fun thing too. Instead of me driving/initiating/shuttling/leading them to these events/trips/errands/whatever…we doing it more “together” now that they’re older. They have opinions and ideas and are able to “hang” on an adult level…and it’s just greatness. Even just grocery shopping with my kids at this age seems more fun.

#2: THEY ARE INDEPENDENT (BUT ALSO NOT AND I LOVE THAT TOO!)

I love, love how independent all of my kiddos have gotten as they’ve morphed into teens. They know how to communicate with their teachers and coaches. They can whip up their own snacks or meals if they’re hungry. They can wash that uniform and let the dogs out without needing permission. They’re just these independent individuals. Buuuuuuuut I also love how they’re still “not” too big. They still want me to cuddle a bit. They love it when I make the pancakes because “I do it best”. They want me to read over their essays and go with them to buy the supplies for their project. They’re independent but they still need mama. It’s a sweet spot.

#1: THEY ARE GENUINELY THEIR OWN PEOPLE NOW

When my kids were little, Andrew and I used to wonder/guess/predict what they’d be like as adults. Right now, I can pretty clearly see what kind of adult their shaping up to be…and that’s really fun. They have their own very unique personalities, interests, hobbies, worries, fears, ambitions, goals, desires…they’re all “them”. I am just really, really loving getting to know these people as they’re getting to know themselves.

Let’s be real though, there are a few things about raising teens that are a little less joyful 😉 .

Here are my BOTTOM FIVE THINGS ABOUT RAISING TEENS…

#5: THERE ARE A LOT OF OPINIONS NOW

Gone are the days when I could make what I wanted for dinner with zero pushback. Or dress them in Matilda Jane with giant bows in their hair. Or insist that their friends be only the children of my friends. Nope. As stated before, they’re real, big, individual people now…with opinions.

#4: THEY’RE EXPENSIVE

Teen things are just way more expensive. Their hobbies and activities come with hefty bills (it’s crazy!). They eat a ton, so groceries and restaurant tabs are more. They’re still outgrowing things, so when you have to buy them those shoes that are “adult priced” you know that the odds of them still fitting in six months is slim. Toddlers play with empty boxes…teenagers do not.

#3: THEY CHALLENGE YOU

I love that I’m raising independent thinkers…until they’re using those skills against me.

#2: OTHER PARENTS

I’ve said this before, but in my experience the hardest part about raising teens are the other parents. It blows my mind what parents don’t just allow but encourage/pay for/support in their homes and with their children (and their children’s friends).

When you’re having playdates with toddlers, you’re pretty much all on the same page. Let’s cut the grapes so no one chokes. Let’s make sure they’re not pushing each other down the slide. All eyes on the kids if we’re in/around a pool. Everyone has common goals. You never think in that moment that fast forward a decade and what you deem “safe” (and legal!) and what the other person deems as safe (often illegal) could be so opposite. It blows my mind that in 2026, it’s often the parents I have to worry about more than the other teenagers.

And finally, my least favorite part about parenting teens is…

#1: THEY’RE ABOUT TO FLY THE NEST

This is such a wonderful, fun, sweet season…but it’s the final season of them being under our roof. Next year, no matter how happy all of the Shulls are where the Lord has planted them, it won’t be the same. It will never be the same. It will be new and fun and different and special in its own way (I just know it!), but it won’t be “this”, and Andrew Shull and I really love “this”.

And that, my friends, are my TOP FIVE, BOTTOM FIVE: TEENAGERS

Now…

It wouldn’t be a TOP FIVE, BOTTOM FIVE without Andrew weighing in too.

Apologies, apologies, apologies to my sweet husband! I always email him and ask him to send in his answers because I don’t want to read/hear his responses before I write mine down. In person and/or text would be hard for me not to hear/read. I emailed him earlier this week with a topic that…I later realized we had already done. Andrew was a trooper and did this twice. Thank YOU!

Here are his…

ANDREW’S TOP FIVE THINGS ABOUT RAISING TEENS :

#5: I know everyone reading this would share this sentiment. God gave Shay and me the BEST kids. Not perfect, just like we aren’t, but to me, they are perfect. For me, being able to take care of them and watch them turn into adults has been the biggest blessing of my life.

#4: I LOVE seeing their personalities evolve. To name one for each kiddo: Kensington’s sarcastic wit, Smith’s quick banter (he gets that from Uncle Sean), Ashby’s incredible way of telling a story that gets all six of us laughing (especially her giggle, which makes me laugh more), and Madeley’s joy that makes every topic just sweet.

#3: I love this phase of being what I call a guide or a coach. When they are little, you are in the cop phase. In this phase, they still have to do what we say, but I like having the conversation. And you know what? Sometimes I see their point of view, and I change my mind on a topic.

#2: Always having something to do or go see. Teenagers are so busy!

#1: Family dinners and them just being around. ALWAYS a good time! I try to “record” in my head these memories. Summers are better for this, but in our busy moments now, I try to never forget to stop and hit record.

ANDREW’S BOTTOM FIVE THINGS ABOUT RAISING TEENS :

#5: The laundry never stops. I don’t put up their laundry, but because I keep all laundry separate, I will flip a load for each kid, and they put it up. However, I swear it’s like they are in a constant wardrobe change because I am doing it all the time!

#4: For you “ticket listeners,” we’ve mostly moved past this phase—but every now and then, we get a little Dylan, the argumentative teen, and I can’t help but chuckle.

#3: Late nights and interrupted sleep. My Oura ring judges me, and I hate it for that.

#2: Thank you, Jesus, that when Shay and I signed up for job duties, I got the sports/activities job and she got school duty. If something happens to Shay, I would have to hire a full-time employee with benefits for this role as I am not equipped to handle it all!

#1: The sink is not the dishwasher, and the floor (every floor in the house) is not the dirty clothes hamper. I feel like they walk in and it’s like a scene in Iron Man and all their “equipment” starts coming off when they enter the door.